Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
