It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
