im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
