I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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