Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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