Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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