Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
