This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
