my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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