What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
