Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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