this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize