I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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