For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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