My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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