During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
