Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I checked into jail on foursquare
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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