Yo dont text me then not text me
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
