We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
