The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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