how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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