She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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