rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize