need another drink. this is the easiest way
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
