so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Even my vagina gasped.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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