Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I will pee on everything he values.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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