she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
