What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
he thought i was a dude.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
