i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
