that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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