i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she smelled like a LAN party
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
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