She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
