I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Randomize
