i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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