Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
