i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
