The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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