your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
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