When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
do nipples grow back?
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