my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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