The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
