considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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