nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
