whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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