I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
