I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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