school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize