we should wear snuggies to the strip club
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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