...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize