ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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