Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
