BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
