I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I pour the whiskey from now on
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